I have to confess something.
I didn’t really like high school. In fact, it’s a part of my life that I was very happy to say goodbye to. Maybe you can relate?
But now that I spend a large part of my day blogging, I have found that there are some correlations between the blog world and high school. With people going on rants about how much they hate someone or just simply using their blog to promote negativity (of course this isn’t true everywhere. there are TONS of bloggers doing amazing things everyday and I am lucky enough to know many of them), I can’t help but look back on those immature days that once seemed so long ago. I’ll explain it all in the video.
Final Thoughts: ALL of us bloggers need to come together and support one another. We need kindness, compassion, and togetherness in this crazy world. Not negativity.
Additional Note: Right after I put this video up on my YouTube channel, I received an email from Christina of Down and Out Chic and we discussed this topic a little more. It turns out that she actually had recently written a similar post on her blog about overcoming blogging insecurities. It’s a really thoughtful post, and it goes perfectly with what I discussed in the video. So, you should definitely check it out.
So, now its your turn to weigh in. Have you ever felt excluded in the blogging world? And what do you think we can all do to make things better for the future?
And if you like this video, please share it with your friends via facebook and twitter. Let’s spread the blogging love to anyone that will listen.
38 comments | Click here to reply
Hey! I really am happy that someone is noticing this, I guess you could say, but not everyone is thinking about it. It happens. I am a freshman in high school, and just from half of the year, (my class is REALLY small and has only 3 girls including me) a click has been created among some girls at my school. Often it seems like they may be whispering behind your back, and I know they don’t mean to, but it happens. I do believe that this does happen in the blogging community, because people believe that maybe they can get away with it with out anyone really jumping down their backs.
I really liked how you said at the end how we need to come together and support one another because those that are just starting up (ex, me 😉 get so excited to get a new comment, it’s like “Wow! They like my stuff!” And I feel this way when I get a comment, and when maybe a new follower, but what really struck me is that it is very easy to get carried away with your own blog, and tutorials, and keep posting. So far, this is one of the few blogs that I have read about where we should work on supporting others. I don’t say this to “get” more followers, but really it is something that I can work on!
Hannah S.Thank you for bringing up the topic!
~Hannah
Aw, thank you so much Jessica. That is great to hear. I really appreciate you stopping by and leaving your thoughts.
papernstitch-Brittni
Hello, Brittni!
I must say that I ENJOY your blog everyday! I eagerly check it, wait for new posts, awe over the talent of so many, think of new ideas…. basically, becuase of YOUR WORK I get my creative fix each day!
Blogging has opened SO many doors! We can get recipies, unique gift ideas, tons of DIY tips… all at our finger tips. For that, I am grateful to YOU, the bloggers, for making my life better. Really, it’s true.
With all that said, I only post when I feel I have something to add or to offer praise. I didn’t realize all the negativity until recently reading comments on Design Spone. Seriously? Grown woman act this way?! What ever happened to “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
So, Brittni, and all the other crazy-talented bloggers out there… keep doing what you are doing! There are WAAYYYYYYYYYYY more people who love what you do, are grateful for what you do, and enjoy what you do. They are just too busy being inspired to write comments.
Hold your head high, keep that chin up!
JessicaI can tell that post REALLY upset you and today was my first visit to your blog. 1st off I send you a cyber hug. 2nd I totally agree that tearing someone down on your blog is NOT cool!
In my short time of reading blogs, I’ve not come across any blogs with an entry like you discuss in your video. But I can absolutley see how blogging could turn into nightmarish High School gossip and put downs. I will not read or support blogs like that either!
I started my blog to share my own positive attitude and approach to life. I agree with you that there is already way too much negativity in the world. Reading, working with, promoting, and supporting positive bloggers is the best way to send positive energy out into the world.
What you put out there will come back to you and I personally want as many good vibrations as I can get.
I think sharing your feelings about this issue is a great way to encourage us all to think about what we are saying, anywhere…
So I say, stay away from negative blogs, please don’t support what they spew! Let’s make our world a better place by be nicer bloggers!
Peace,
Donna@soakinginmustard.comDonna
Thank you all so much for the amazing comments and thoughtful responses. I have really enjoyed reading every single one of them.
papernstitch-Brittni
Love your video & the comments! It is great to read through them & see so many familiar faces & know that we are all really on the same page.
I think life can be like high school if we let it-so much of our culture seeks to divide us from one another & put labels & boxes on who we are/what we do, to make us think we need status to be successful. I think there will always be people who make themselves feel more important by making someone else feel smaller. It’s sad, it sucks and is SO unnecessary but I have found the best defense is to meet crabbiness with cupcakes. If the sweetness doesn’t work then I’ll leave them to stew in their own misery-but I can choose to be welcoming, non-judgmental, kind & filled with love for our online community.
I think like calls to like, just like those cliques in high school-I think if you build a blog based on honesty, love & open arms then we can be havens from the bitter parts of life. I can’t control the world or the fact that people think the anonymity of the internet is cause to be mean but I can control my little corner of the net & fill it with light & happiness & all the good things in life we can never get enough of. I reach out & connect with other people whose writing/personality reflects that same genuine caring-hopefully eventually our anti-clique of acceptance & community will far outweigh the nasties & they can hang out in some dusty corner of the web until they get over themselves & their egos. We’re all in this together-we might as well make it great!!!
Jessika (Oh My Handmade)Hey Brittany! I haven’t been around the blogging community long enough to make a good judgement on this topic, but I think the #1 think bloggers can do to prevent this is to make a decision here and now that they won’t be among the blogs that bash people {namelessly or not}. Each commitment is one less possible offense in the blogosphere. If you have a problem with someone, you need to put on your big girl panties/ big boy undies and go address it with that person in private. Your drama isn’t for the rest of the world to know about. We need to simplify life, not create chaos.
MeaganThank you for posting this! As a new blogger, I’ve often felt the sting of “high school”-type outcast-dom. I’ve always wondered if bloggers who have been around longer felt the same way. Thanks again!
JessYou bring up a very good point here Andy, “I think blogging is not so much like high school as it is like life”
papernstitchJessica, who previously commented said something similar and I agree with you both. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment.
-Brittni
Hi, Brittni. I think blogging is not so much like high school as it is like life: There majority out there are really pretty good and nice, but the handful of mean ones get more than their share of attention and spoil the joy for everyone else.
The difference with high school is that the proportion of meanies in high school is significantly higher, as far as I remember (yes, I really, REALLY hated high school), and they don’t just spoil the joy for everyone else, they lord it over the whole class and make even the nice people try to be mean, which is not the same with bloggers at all.
We bloggers are really a more adult group, and if there are a few of us that still do sound like they are one of those mean high schoolers, at least they don’t get the approval of the majority as they would in a real high school.
AndyThanks so much for this, Brittni. This has clearly struck a cord with many people, including me.
Emily, I’ve seen the same thing happen and it definitely draws out my insecurities. I’m much less apt to email another blogger that I admire if I think that I might be “annoying” them. It’s sad, really. With out the fans, their blog wouldn’t exist. It’s all very silly.
Thanks for stirring up this discussion. My wheels are turning about how to continue to create a positive community of bloggers.
Lauren | Stamp 48Brittni, great topic. I loved what Nadine had to say about being real, but it’s easy for the negativity to seep in. Have your bad day, admit to being imperfect and move on. I’m far from prefect and I like being able to use my blog as a journal- good days and bad days alike; although I tend to stay on the positive side when composing a post.
margaretI would hate to read any blog post that was negative towards a specific person or thing. It’s not worth it. Hopefully as we age we can learn to respect others for their differences and see the multitude of lessons we have learned by dealing with difficult people.
I love all the bloggers out there that are sharing their skills, art and insight with the rest of us. But at times it does feel a bit like high school all over again. Unless I have x amount of followers, or have been featured by so and so- well I’m not welcome or worth the time of a reply email. It’s hard to read respected bloggers write posts about responding to commenter but because of the high volume of emails they receive they can’t or won’t do as they say. What we need is a little patience in this instant gratification world we live in and a bit of trust between blogger and reader.
Thank you for bringing up this topic.
That hits home with me, Sasha. It’s not just about bloggers posting negatively. It’s about the readers posting negative comments as well, oftentimes more!
Thanks for the food for thought…
LauraBoth in life and in the online community, I think bloggers and commenters alike need to keep in mind that individuality and imperfection is welcomed, but flat out negative criticism without a suggestion of improvement is not okay.
I enjoy when bloggers are real and down to earth – It’s okay to get into the nitty gritty of life. We can talk about politics and religion and whatever else pushes peoples’ buttons, it makes life interesting! We just need to be respectful of others’ views and ideas so we can really learn from one another.
Great post Brittni! Something important to keep in mind 🙂
SashaHi Brittni ,
The analogy is really spot on. Lets be positive and focus on good things and spread the positive vibe . After all, we all know positive thinking and talking goes a long way .
Leave the negativity , catty drama to the high schoolers AND politicians !
lakshmiJessica, you are so right: “.. just as a late 20-something. It’s kinda like being a freshmen of life.”
papernstitchI am going to be 27 this year, so I am in my late 20s as well, and I hadn’t thought of life this way before. But its actually quite inspiring in a way. I feel like I’ve been able to do so much and learn so much in my “freshman life stage”, so I am looking forward to those next few phases. 🙂 Thanks for your thoughts.
-Brittni
I agree and have been working through this myself, not only as a blogger but just as a late 20-something. It’s kinda like being a freshmen of life. As a child and teen I always preferred the company of my elders than my peers and now that I am an adult I realize that all of the adults I always looked up to are now my peers as well, professionally speaking, as an adult and especially as an entrepreneur.
It is sad to say that the same tendencies of ‘drama’ from high school run through every area of society and every age group.
It just insecurity. Its just how some people know how to deal, despite the terrible nature of it. The best thing to do is to not be like that yourself.
That’s all you can ever really do.
JessicaI suppose that is the reality of life…negativity is around…some people seem to be even drawn to it. We all have to choose what we want to be a part of…more and more I think we have the power to do so. I have to agree that many things in life are silly and petty – like back in high school – and I want no part of it definitely!
linda