New Video: Why Blogging is like High School + How We Can Fix It

Hey! I really am happy that someone is noticing this, I guess you could say, but not everyone is thinking about it. It happens. I am a freshman in high school, and just from half of the year, (my class is REALLY small and has only 3 girls including me) a click has been created among some girls at my school. Often it seems like they may be whispering behind your back, and I know they don’t mean to, but it happens. I do believe that this does happen in the blogging community, because people believe that maybe they can get away with it with out anyone really jumping down their backs.

I really liked how you said at the end how we need to come together and support one another because those that are just starting up (ex, me 😉 get so excited to get a new comment, it’s like “Wow! They like my stuff!” And I feel this way when I get a comment, and when maybe a new follower, but what really struck me is that it is very easy to get carried away with your own blog, and tutorials, and keep posting. So far, this is one of the few blogs that I have read about where we should work on supporting others. I don’t say this to “get” more followers, but really it is something that I can work on!
Thank you for bringing up the topic!
~Hannah

I can tell that post REALLY upset you and today was my first visit to your blog. 1st off I send you a cyber hug. 2nd I totally agree that tearing someone down on your blog is NOT cool!

In my short time of reading blogs, I’ve not come across any blogs with an entry like you discuss in your video. But I can absolutley see how blogging could turn into nightmarish High School gossip and put downs. I will not read or support blogs like that either!

I started my blog to share my own positive attitude and approach to life. I agree with you that there is already way too much negativity in the world. Reading, working with, promoting, and supporting positive bloggers is the best way to send positive energy out into the world.

What you put out there will come back to you and I personally want as many good vibrations as I can get.

I think sharing your feelings about this issue is a great way to encourage us all to think about what we are saying, anywhere…

So I say, stay away from negative blogs, please don’t support what they spew! Let’s make our world a better place by be nicer bloggers!

Peace,
Donna

Hey Brittany! I haven’t been around the blogging community long enough to make a good judgement on this topic, but I think the #1 think bloggers can do to prevent this is to make a decision here and now that they won’t be among the blogs that bash people {namelessly or not}. Each commitment is one less possible offense in the blogosphere. If you have a problem with someone, you need to put on your big girl panties/ big boy undies and go address it with that person in private. Your drama isn’t for the rest of the world to know about. We need to simplify life, not create chaos.

Hi, Brittni. I think blogging is not so much like high school as it is like life: There majority out there are really pretty good and nice, but the handful of mean ones get more than their share of attention and spoil the joy for everyone else.

The difference with high school is that the proportion of meanies in high school is significantly higher, as far as I remember (yes, I really, REALLY hated high school), and they don’t just spoil the joy for everyone else, they lord it over the whole class and make even the nice people try to be mean, which is not the same with bloggers at all.

We bloggers are really a more adult group, and if there are a few of us that still do sound like they are one of those mean high schoolers, at least they don’t get the approval of the majority as they would in a real high school.

Brittni, great topic. I loved what Nadine had to say about being real, but it’s easy for the negativity to seep in. Have your bad day, admit to being imperfect and move on. I’m far from prefect and I like being able to use my blog as a journal- good days and bad days alike; although I tend to stay on the positive side when composing a post.
I would hate to read any blog post that was negative towards a specific person or thing. It’s not worth it. Hopefully as we age we can learn to respect others for their differences and see the multitude of lessons we have learned by dealing with difficult people.
I love all the bloggers out there that are sharing their skills, art and insight with the rest of us. But at times it does feel a bit like high school all over again. Unless I have x amount of followers, or have been featured by so and so- well I’m not welcome or worth the time of a reply email. It’s hard to read respected bloggers write posts about responding to commenter but because of the high volume of emails they receive they can’t or won’t do as they say. What we need is a little patience in this instant gratification world we live in and a bit of trust between blogger and reader.
Thank you for bringing up this topic.

Both in life and in the online community, I think bloggers and commenters alike need to keep in mind that individuality and imperfection is welcomed, but flat out negative criticism without a suggestion of improvement is not okay.

I enjoy when bloggers are real and down to earth – It’s okay to get into the nitty gritty of life. We can talk about politics and religion and whatever else pushes peoples’ buttons, it makes life interesting! We just need to be respectful of others’ views and ideas so we can really learn from one another.

Great post Brittni! Something important to keep in mind 🙂

I agree and have been working through this myself, not only as a blogger but just as a late 20-something. It’s kinda like being a freshmen of life. As a child and teen I always preferred the company of my elders than my peers and now that I am an adult I realize that all of the adults I always looked up to are now my peers as well, professionally speaking, as an adult and especially as an entrepreneur.

It is sad to say that the same tendencies of ‘drama’ from high school run through every area of society and every age group.

It just insecurity. Its just how some people know how to deal, despite the terrible nature of it. The best thing to do is to not be like that yourself.

That’s all you can ever really do.

So true… I hated highschool! I really try not to read or post negative things. I want to go on a blog and learn something new, see something different and become better for it. Holli @ decor8 is the best. She always sets a great example for other bloggers. She is my mentor!

Hey Brittni + other commenters: I love this video; the question raised and comments above have resonated with me all afternoon. It’s nice to know that I’m not alone in having insecurities and wanting everyone to be happy and encouraging and reinforcing; it’s not like we’re competing for the last spot on Varsity Soccer, we’re working in a medium that exceeds no maximum capacity, so why shouldn’t we all get along and help it be the best venue it can be, whether it be for professional reasons or for fun?

I’m insecure still. It took me a long while to admit to being interested in blogging, and starting up my own site has been a major a test in many ways. Do I want people looking at me? Do I want people knowing about my house? Do I want people thinking that I think I’m cool, because I’m not? Are people going to see me as a thought leader? Am I going to be fighting to stay ahead of a curve?

Even shortly after I began writing, I tried networking with some of the bloggers I was inspired by, only to feel by some that I was just another email in their inbox; I even saw one tweet about how annoyed they were to get emails/messages from “fans”. It seemed irresponsible for someone who is respected and looked up to to partake in a high school mentality. I felt like the “new girl” in the high school, which I think we can all agree, totally blows (or would blow).

Keep on keepin’ on. I love your position in the industry, Brittni, I think you really stand out in the mix.

Emily

That’s a great post, I didn’t really love high school either and I absolutely understand what you mean however I have only found good stuff in the blogosphere, but I have heard about this topic a lot. Food for thought, we definitely need to keep negativity outside this world, you are so right, there is enough of that shit. way to go, really enjoyed it!

er, I do *read* one completely fantastic blog…

The cattiness that you found on the blog you mentioned is not something that is limited to blogging or high school. There are a lot of people who are frankly insecure and feel compelled to tear other people down to make themselves look/feel better. You find it in the work place, the playing fields, parent organizations — everywhere.

That said I believe there are more genuinely good, generous, helpful, loving people in the world and they blog too. They share their stories to be of assistance to others, to inspire others, or to help themselves not feel lonely. All good reasons. Our job, as readers is to support those who fit our definition of good and decent people.

If I came across a blog post that was so negative I wouldn’t bother reading the rest of it. I don’t have time for that kind of thinking. If they were in my blog reader for another reason (like great tutorials or inspiring images) they may not last the day. Keep up the good work you do and support those you identify with, ignore the rest – life is too short to stress about other people.

Hi Brittni! This is a great topic for discussion. Thanks for addressing it.
I agree with you in that with this particular example the negative blogger has reverted to high school tendencies which is such a shame. I think people can definitely hide behind their blogs a bit and in this case, say something that they probably would never say to the person face-to-face. But that doesn’t justify the action. You shouldn’t be using your blog as a way to say nasty things about others. Just because it isn’t face-to-face, doesn’t mean it is any less hurtful.

I don’t mind when blogs offer a critic but not when they verbally abuse. There is a difference. It’s one thing to say, “I don’t agree with this person” but definitely another to say “This person is horrible, stupid, etc., etc.”

With my blog, I always try and remain positive and in my experience, that is what other bloggers are doing too. All of the people I have come into direct contact with are super positive and supportive and I’ve met some of the nicest, sweetest people after I started my blog and began connecting with people. Although there may be pockets of nastiness, I think that, overall, the community is positive. My only suggestion can be, read what makes you happy! Support bloggers that are positive and that try and make the community a better one. 🙂

Great post. You’re right- it can be a lot like high school (I hated high school too), and it would serve us all well to do something to keep the positive vibes outweighing the negative/exclusive ones.

thanks for posting this! :]